POTC
Pirates of the Caribbean – Saw this a bunch of years ago, but felt like watching it again on Zen’s request. Zen has been interested in the soundtrack music. Personally, I’m interested in seeing Keith Richard’s appearances in the third and fourth movies.
The film is good, and full of crackling dialogue.
I never would have thought of that.
Clearly, you’ve never been to Singapore.
Take what you can, give nothing back
What did you make the rope with?
Human hair. From my back.
Thank you, Jack.
You’re welcome.
Not you – we named the monkey Jack.
Overall the film is full of great action, some of it by the wild-eyed, gaunt and stunningly beautiful Keira Knightly, some good humour, and the corny fun of “pirates” and “Caribbean”, with its cast of scalawags and scoundrels and campy Hollywood soundstage scenes (ie the pirate’s port). Johnny Depp creates a character with such goofy charm that we don’t even mind the Luke Skywalker-edness of Orlando Bloom.
One of the interesting things about the film is the perception that the sets are real, that the boats are real, and that the explosions and stunts are real. The use of computer graphics seems to have been kept to a minimum, the important exception probably being the view of the ghouls preparing for attack by marching the ocean floor – a cool scene indeed. The other ghoul effects are also very cool – when moonlight touches the pirates their ghoul selves are revealed. This is done in a very spectacular cinematographic way, such as when Barbossa steps into the moonlight, uncorks a bottle of wine, and you see it flow through him. No wonder he looks on so enviously as Elizabeth tucks in to some real food, and Jack eats an apple.
POTCDMC
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest – Like a Tintin adventure, there’s fast-paced adventure in exotic lands with strange natives, exotic stunts a-plenty. There’s the introduction of a new villain, the nefarious Lord Turner (who carries some sort of supernatural threat about his that is, sadly, never realised, nor do we ever see the mark Jack Sparrow left on him). Some ways into the film things start to get hot and heavy and plenty weird as we find Jack Sparrow now the chief of an island of cannibals. Great gags, stunts and physical humour here that include rotting fruit, a round cage of human bones hung over a cliff. Great dialogue and interchange between Jack and Gibbs, and between Pintel and Ragetti (not to mention Ragetti’s bouncing eye) who share a surreal argument about the Bible, “you get credit for trying”. Then there’s the witch Tia Dalma, who speaks in a thick Caribbean twang, “you have a touch of destiny about you, Will Turner.” “How’d you know my name?” Don’t we all have a touch of destiny about us? Nonetheless, the dialogue is terrific, and the screenplay crisp, such as the argument over the correct pronunciation of “Kraken” – “It’s a mythological creature, I’ll pronounce it’s name how I wants.” (strangely, it falls flat in the third movie – this may be the best Pirates movie). Nice little dance, spin and spit when pirates confronted by a possible ghost (a nice trick played by Elizabeth Swann). “I don’t give an ass rat’s if I love or die.” Each scene gorgeously luxurious. Davey Jones’ tentacled face gorgeous, his snorting and weird way of talking great fun. His crewe are too CG-ladled, though, although the scum and grime coating the Flying Dutchman seems to have a deliciously grody life of its own. Elizabeth’s flirt with Jack is a bit of a come-on, both in the middle and at the end. The three-man Caribbean swordfight is stunning choreography, as is the fight within the water wheel, and the rapid switching of sides, the battle over the dead man’s chest, great physical humor. Awesome finale.
This film marks the emergence of Stellan SkarsgÃ¥rd as Bootstrap Bill, Will Turner’s father. The name Stellan SkarsgÃ¥rd is unknown to me, despite having actually seen him in tons of films – The Kingdom, Breaking The Waves, Insomnia, Thor and The Avengers.
POTCAWE
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End – This is the movie where things kind of fell apart, just like in the last Matrix film, or whatnot. Many superfluous scenes that make no sense whatsoever – the mass executions in the first scene, the escape of Calypso (never to be seen again), the involvement/under-use of Chow Yun Fat. The opening action scenes are in “Singapore”, although from its mountainous terrain it looks more like Guilin than flat old Singapore. Naturally, there’s lots of bloodshed and killing, but since it’s a Disney film it’s done without explicitness or gore.
But the film is still full of wonderful moments, like when the dwarf crewman played by Martin Klebba (yes, that’s not Mini-Me Verne Troyer) fires a huge gun and gets blown backwards, the monkey Jack fires a rocket (actually, any scene he’s in is pretty funny). Then there’s a great scene with Keith Richards, which includes him playing guitar (and, in a tense moment, breaking a string). There is also the surreal hallucinatory scene where Jack is on a ship crewed by many Jacks (the first scene Johnny Depp is in, 34 minutes into the bloody film!!!); later on in the film, there’s a reprise where two mini-Jacks come out to sit on his shoulder, and again in the jail when the zombie jack removes his own brain and fondles it, licks it, then drops it on the ground. “Nobody move – I dropped me brain.” Love how they keep saying “savvy?” throughout the film (my son and I have started saying it ourselves), and the phrase “keep a weather eye on the horizon”. Nice dialogue, like “I wash my hands of this weirdness”, or “Close your eyes and pretend it’s all a bad dream. That’s how I get by.”. There’s an interesting plot thingy where Will and Elizabeth are at odds with each other, “I chose to bear this burden alone,” “If you make your choices alone, how can I trust you?” “You can’t.” Poochie’s back from the second film with the key, except this time we know what the key’s for. Nice touch. Hilarious scene between Johnny Depp and Keith Richards. “How’s mum? Oh… she looks great.”
I also wonder why James Hong is not in this film – he’s in every other films that has elderly Chinese fellows, going all the way back to The Sand Pebbles of 1965. Apparently, this film is the most expensive ever made, as of end-2012. The DVD I watched has over five minutes of bloopers, none of them anything special at all.
POTCOST
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides – Wacky intro – at sea, in the court of the Spanish king, “How soon can you sail?” “Weeth thee tide.” Brrrr… First view of London, Jack in court, jack in the king’s palace, Jack making an escape in a horse cart, at The Captain’s Daughter pub, at the dock, then trying to organize a mutiny on Blackbeard’s boat… ulp! Great Keith Richards cameo – “Does this face look like it’s been to the Fountain of Youth?” – although it’s not as good as the one in Part 3 when he plays the guitar dramatically. Great drunken Captain Jack Sparrow – “I can name fingers and point names.” Cool interaction with Penelope Cruz. “I’m your first mate.” “Was I your first? I’ve often wondered.” Black Pearl in a bottle now – complete with monkey. “I still hate that monkey!!”
The lies I told you were not lies.
You lied to me by telling the truth? That’s very good. May I use that?
Strange plot, strange alliances, strange zombie crew (the quartermaster, a white zombie). Freaky battles with mermaids. Weird moment when the Fountain of Youth sucks the life out of Edward Teach. Priest is killed again and again – three times? Christ-like, I guess. Last word of the film: “Savvy?”
Watch to the end of the credits – there’s a missing scene – Jack’s voodoo doll washes up on the island Penelope Cruz was stranded on. Ha ha!! Bloopers scenes, not so great, although one where Depp uses the sword to remove Cruz’s tri-corner hat is kind of funny…